When I was a kid all I ever wanted to be was a singer. I loved to sing! I would spend hours in my bedroom singing with my stereo. I loved trying to mimic Whitney Houston. I knew my family could hear me, but having the door closed made me feel safe. I didn’t like to sing in front of people. I could sing with the stereo in the living room or in the car as long as it was loud enough that people couldn’t hear me. Also, my cousins and I would put on shows for our family at summer picnics. We would get all dressed up in costumes and have microphones and our little stereo. When it came to show time we would usually get scared and skip it.
In elementary school I would sing in the chorus because I had to, but when it came time to make a choice I would choose band over chorus. I was too afraid to join chorus for fear that I would be chosen for a solo or something. There was no way I could stand in front of a crowd and sing by myself. I always wished that I could, but I still haven’t done it. I hated being in band and didn’t enjoy playing the flute. I think it’s because singing makes me happy and I just couldn’t do it. In college I decided I would face my fears and join chorus. I took private voice lessons too. It was difficult for me to sing in front of my teacher, but I did it. Luckily I never had to sing a solo in chorus, but I’m so glad I pushed myself to pursue something I loved.
Obviously I knew I could never make a career out of it, but singing always makes me happy. To this day I enjoy belting out toons when no one is home and I regularly sing in the car and with my kids. I still have a vision in my head of me singing in a bar somewhere while playing the piano, but I doubt that will happen. One of my kids likes to sing and takes a theater class. She says that someday we will sing together onstage. Who knows! Maybe she’ll be the one that helps me get over my fear and pursue my dream of singing.
So what did you want to be when you grew up? Did you make it happen? If not, then what changed your mind?